Doctor Who: Arachnids in the UK

Doctor: 'I call people dude now.'

Four episodes in, I think it safe to say that the show's found its style and rhythm. Despite a few glitches, the Doctor's personality is pretty much established; Yaz, Ryan and Graham have been given rudimentary backstories; and we now know what sort of stories Chibnall wants to tell. The question is: are they stories we want to see and hear?

As far as plots go, this was as basic as it gets. The core concept was a partial retread of 'The Green Death' (without all that pesky complexity and engaging character nonsense), there was some running around, some creepy spiders, some light character development for the supporting cast, and one of the most straightforward endings known to man. (Robertson just shot the spider and fucked off home.) Add an all too on-the-nose Trump-hating Trump clone, a spider expert stood conveniently outside the door, and that was pretty much the nuts and bolts.

I freely admit, I didn't understand the Trump stuff at all. Robertson was a character who allegedly hated Trump, yet was like him in every way. What was Chibnall trying to tell us here? If it's that guns are bad, then we know dude—so why let them win the day? If it was that being like Trump is bad, then we're right with you—but why is Trump currently president, and why did the fictional Robertson get to claim he's 'what the world needs' without rebuttal? I get that parody can be a useful tool in teaching, but what did such a broad-stroke caricature actually convey in terms of message, and was that message coherent?

Robertson was just too big for the episode. The rest of the cast played it comparatively low-key in an attempt to get across the gravity of the situation, only for Robertson to undermine their efforts in establishing tone with his Trump quoting, cliche-ridden bollocks. What were his scheduled bathroom breaks, incessant attempts at belittling the show's female characters, and obsession with guns all about? And to end Robertson's story with him walking away unpunished after a failed scolding by the Doctor, really did seem like the final indignity. Is she going to let everyone get away scot-free this season?

The sad thing is, I agree with the sentiment: guns, knives, racism and Trump's values are bad... but you need to do more than just say it. You need to explain why, otherwise people who think differently won't understand. In fact, I'm pretty sure that viewers of a certain political persuasion will have watched tonight's episode and thought that Robertson won. He undermined the Doctor's authority throughout, saved the day, and then walked away more sure of his twisted values than ever before. Some people on Twitter have suggested that Robertson will be back later in the season. I fucking hope not! Once was more than enough.

Graham interacting with Grace's 'ghost' was more successful. After offing her back in episode one, I was ready to see some fallout from her death, and seeing Graham deal with the physical and emotional emptiness of a flat without Grace was a moving moment. Him wanting to travel with the Doctor made absolute sense in light of his loss. Yaz's reasons made less sense to me. Yes, her family were a bit irritating, but not so dysfunctional that she just had to get away. Even her rubbish-hoarding father seemed less bonkers after having his conspiracy theory authenticated. In fact, for an episode heavily focused on Yaz, I don't feel like we learned much about her at all.

The CGI spiders were cool, the atmosphere was excellent, and I liked the final scenes aboard the TARDIS. At last, it feels like we have a crew again. Apart from that, this felt like another shallow episode. 'Rosa' made up for its wafer-thin plot with a healthy dollop of history, but mutant spiders just don't carry the same emotional weight. And the Doctor really needs to start taking control. Tonight she promised that Robertson wouldn't kill any spiders, yet he did. This does not feel like a Doctor in charge. Whether that's intentional or incidental, we'll have to wait and see, but I really hope she starts holding people's feet to the fire soon.

Other Thoughts:

—A rubbish collection every Friday?! Where is this fictional utopia of which Grace O'Brien speaks?

—I'm not entirely sure what sort of humane death Jade was referring to. Suffocation? Starvation? Or did she have some other 'humane' death in mind?

—It's the little things that really undo a scene... like Ryan leaning against the wrong side of a door which opened inward to hold it closed.

—So, the other spiders around town: what happened to them?

—I can't see many people under 30 getting the Sex Pistols title reference.

—I know you can't account for these things, but Robertson's 'Why don't you do what normal people do?' line was a bit too close for comfort after the Pittsburgh shooting.

Quotes:

Jade: 'This doesn't make any sense. This isn't what spiders do.'

Robertson: 'Who are you people?'
Graham: 'A word of advice, mate. Run now, ask questions later.'

Doctor: 'Are you Ed Sheeran? Is he Ed Sheeran? Everyone talks about Ed Sheeran about now, don't they?'

Ryan: 'She's in charge, bro.'
Robertson: 'Says who?'
All: 'Says us!'

Doctor: 'I eat danger for breakfast. I don't, I prefer cereal. Or croissants. Or those little fried Portuguese... never mind, it's not important.'